clothes encounters

I’ve often wondered how our earliest experiences of intimacy shape what we come to find pleasurable. Sometimes, a tactile memory stays with us long after the circumstances surrounding it have faded.

I remember making out with my first boyfriend. We were young, each other’s first kisses, and neither of us really knew how far we could go. There was something incredibly hot about two bodies pressing against each other while still fully clothed. Every step was new, nerve-racking and a little daring. Much of the excitement came from the anticipation of discovering something neither of us had done before.

During one of our make-out sessions, he slipped his hand under my blouse and kissed me there. Even today, that remains one of my favourite parts of foreplay, more arousing to me than what comes later. Maybe it isn’t the physical sensation, but the sense of possibility, nervous curiosity and thrill of something new that make it so appealing. My body seems to have retained those adolescent imprints, even though my feelings about that particular encounter are more complicated.

In hindsight, I don’t think I was ready for that step. Although it was consensual, I felt awful afterwards. His friends had arrived unannounced, and he hadn’t asked them to leave. We somehow even fell off his bed while they waited downstairs. What had begun as a tender moment became awkward and uncomfortable. I felt exposed, out of place and simply wanted to go home.

Perhaps our earliest explorations of intimacy leave lasting traces that colour our sexual inclinations, even when they are tied to memories that are not entirely happy.

alone, not lonely

There is strength in being comfortable enough with yourself to be alone. It takes maturity to recognise that not every environment is right for you. Fitting in is easy.

Choosing your own company over discomfort takes self-awareness. You don’t need to sacrifice your peace for acceptance. Solitude gives you the freedom to enjoy companionship when it feels right, rather than out of pressure or fear of being left out.  

There is something sad about people who spend their time watching and talking about someone who has chosen to be alone. That energy could be better spent working on themselves rather than keeping tabs on others.

You don’t need an audience to feel valued, a crowd to feel accepted, or anyone’s approval to feel comfortable in your own skin. You can enjoy your own space today and socialise tomorrow. True confidence lies in having the freedom to make either choice without needing to justify it.

stay

Animals, and dogs in particular, have a unique way of offering comfort and companionship. Perhaps it’s because they can’t speak, so they don’t judge, question or try to fix you. They simply stay.

They sit beside you through the hard days, quietly reminding you that you’re not alone. Their loyalty is unwavering, and their love is uncomplicated and unconditional.

Sometimes, the comfort a dog gives you is something no human can offer.

fowl play

Things were going swimmingly well on our morning walk until Logan’s weakness for feathered creatures got the better of him. He was so focused on chasing ducks that he forgot his aversion to water and followed them straight into the ocean.

The last time something like this happened, he was with a dog trainer to work on recall. He strayed from the pack to go after bush turkeys and indulged in unsanctioned swims at the beach, which led to his suspension from the training facility.

Initially, this brought shame to our family, known for raising obedient overachievers, but we’ve since realised that Logan’s quirky pursuits add character, so now, we’re embracing his bird-brained adventures with pride.