I've been catching up with my primary school best friend. She just graduated with a degree in Economics and is now working. We're currently emailing each other at work, and I’m slowly corrupting her, showing her the ropes. I’m turning her to the dark side, teaching her the fine art of abusing email privileges in the workplace. She thinks I'm a bludger, but who doesn't? However, I think we should define the term "bludger" before we go pointing any fingers.
Main Entry: bludge
Definition: To shirk or avoid work; also bludge on
Etymology: Back formation of bludger 'someone who imposes'
Usage: Australian slang; bludged, bludging
After a minute of research, I’d like to defend myself here. By this definition, I’m not a bludger. I always get everything done at work. I’m an expert at what I do, so I have plenty of free time to do whatever I wish. I have the right to do that. I’m extremely bored at work because there is no challenge, so I resort to emailing friends, blog surfing, checking eBay, and watching my nails grow. As long as I get my work done, where’s the harm? I haven't had any complaints from my superiors; they actually think I’m a hard worker. See, I have this split personality when it comes to work. I’m like a completely different person.
I’m beginning to wonder if it's healthy because it feels like I’m leading two lives, well, more like juggling multiple personalities. At work, I’m this passive, quiet girl who has no social life. Every time my colleagues ask me what I did on the weekend, I tell them I was studying. This way, I don't have to engage in conversations that would exceed more than two minutes. I’ve recently brought headphones to work for my mp3s, so any chances left of me socialising with other people are out the window. According to my workmates, I’m this genius who studies all day and night. I usually come to work late, so I feel morally obligated to stay back after work (just so I won’t look like a bludger, but really, all I ever do when I stay back is surf the internet), so everyone at work thinks I don't have a life. Which is exactly what I wanted them to think... but now I've changed my mind.
So there you have it, I need to get a new job, change companies because it’s too late to start over with these people. I can't just turn up tomorrow and be myself; I’ve already labeled myself as the quiet antisocial girl, so I’m stuck with it. I need a fresh start because I can’t go on pretending like this. I have nightmares about bumping into work people in the outside world; they will see a different girl from the one they know at work. And I will be exposed.